Advice By People Who Have No Experience On That Topic

OPEN ON A BUNCH OF “FOR DUMMIES” BOOKS BEING GRAPHICALLY DISPLAYED ON SCREEN.

AVO:
From the people who brought you Books for Dummies comes…

CUT TO LARGE TITLE:

“Advice From The Inexperienced”—books written people who have no experience on what they’re giving advice about.

CUT TO MEL EPSTEIN ON SITTING AT HIS DESK.

AVO:
Explore the wonder of “What It Means To Be Jewish” by Mel Epstein, a guy who never went to temple in his life, knows nothing about Israel and isn’t even circumcised.

Mel:
Let me tell you about the Jewish experience and how we deal with it.


CUT TO A GROUP OF 20-YEAR-OLD WOMAN DRINKING MARTINIS IN A BAR.

AVO: Learn how to raise your kids with advice the authors of “We Don’t Kids, BUT…”

WOMAN 1
I mean, I babysat? Like once? And the parents totally gave the kid ice cream because the mom said she didn’t want to “deal with a tantrum right now.” You need to deal, lady!

WOMAN 2
I know! And my sister tries to “talk to” her kids. I mean, just tell them what to do!


WOMAN 3
THAT’S why kids have tantrums in public! They’re confused about who’s boss!


THEY ALL HIGH FIVE ONE ANOTHER IN A DOUCHEY WAY.


AVO:
Only “Advice From The Inexperienced” provides such stimulating titles like

“The Best Way To Drive This Rental Car” By A Guy Who Never Had A License.

“How You Should Grill” By A Dude Who’s Afraid Of Fire


“This Is The Best Way To Sandy’s House” By A Woman Who’s Never Been There, Didn’t Map Quest It and Doesn’t Even Really Know Sandy.


Act now and we’ll throw in free copy of our handbook, “Condescending Attitudes From People Who Think They Know More Than You Because They’re Like, 3 Years Older.”

CUT TO 35-YEAR-OLD GUY

GUY:
Oh, you THINK you know 30, but heh-heh, you don’t.


Delve into “Advice From The Inexperienced” and start getting more irritated than tight, moist pants against your leg today!